Kid stereotypes

So you shocked each other. Kinda sad huh?

I wish I was that talented. I have a hard time with english, which is all I know :)

KarilouMomof2 is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com living in Tempe. Her daughters are 9 and 6.

Just out of curiousity, how old were these kids?

I am thinking back to my childhood and having grown up caucasian in an ethnically diverse city, I am so appreciative of the cultures that I was exposed to.

I have to say, unfortunately, stereotyping happens at all ages -- it's when the kids experience different peoples and their cultures all on their own that they are able to make informed decisions for themselves.

These kids assuming that you don't speak spanish because of the color of your skin is probably because it was the very first time they have encountered someone with different skin then their own speaking spanish --the language that they know people of THEIR COLOR speak.

I don't think this assumption is sad, I just think it's a learning experience, just as I was able to learn things about the people I grew up with that were different than me.

I am thankful that I now have good friends of all different cultures....Egyptian, Cuban, Nigerian, Dominican, Bangladeshi, Turkish, Croatian, Albanian, Iranian, Palestinian, Colombian, Jamaican, Ecuadorian...these are people who have touched my life, taught me something, and who I am proud to call my friends.

Perhaps this "stereotype" is one of many lessons these kids can learn from and hopefully have the opportunity in the future to make informed decisions about lots of other people different from them.

I loved reading your story. My husband speaks Spanish pretty fluently as well and he is red hair, blue eyed and Irish. Growing up in Phoenix and working in the constructio industry for about 20 years has taught him well. I know some but not as much (mostly I can understand but not speak it). It does show that we can't always judge / stereotype individuals.

Oh and just an FYI, I have dark hair (naturally) and olive skin and when I was 16 people thought I was Hispanic all the time (we are Hungarian, Russian and Irish on my side). So it just goes to show, you aren't always how you look!

"It's not to late to become who you've always wanted to be..."

Stereotyping or just life inexperience? I think in the adult world we stereotype based upon collective prior experiences or social opinions and in the kid world its more of "whatever happened last".

I agree. I don't think it's about stereotyping as much as it is about their experience to date. When I was that age, the kids we identified as "Mexican" were the children of migrant farm workers, and they only came to school from October to April. Needless to say, they were poor, they struggled with English (no ESL back then), and didn't get very good grades.

I knew that about hispanic people, and, after my Dad went to the Olympics in Mexico City, that Mexicans put hot sauce on their eggs.

Looking back, I realize that there were a bunch of other hispanic families in the neighborhood (i.e. the Delgados) who had been here for generations. First, I had to go to college and fall in love with someone for whom Spanish was the primary language. Now, I envy hispanic children for the families they get to grow up in. I can order lunch in rural Puerto Rico (badly), and I understand most of the Spanish I hear. Oh, and I have been known to put picante or green chili on my eggs.

Some day, I'll tell some stories about the stupid things I did and said because my only experience of African Americans was what I saw on TV. In the 60's and 70's.

I'm always fascinated with how kids relate to other cultures, races, etc. My kids are half Korean (I'm the Caucasian half), and there have been many interesting comments about their and other's identities over the years.

Once, while in 1st or 2nd grade, my eldest daughter came home saying she was Chinese because she met a Chinese girl who's eyes and hair were similar to hers. Plus she loved Chinese food and wanted to be able to eat it everyday.

My youngest daughter told me once that she's not Korean or Caucasian, she's a mini-mommy (she does look a lot like me).

My son refers to an African American boy he knows as "the kid with the dark tan."

I've been criticized before by people who felt that I should raise my kids with a strong knowledge of their Korean heritage, including the language. However, my ex-husband never felt that was important -- he can't even speak Korean. We never followed any Korean customs when we were married. As a result, I think it's really cool that my kids don't necessarily identify themselves or other kids by their race. I kind of wish I could keep them in a bubble, free of stereotypes until they're adults.....

DesertMom
http://ppdsurvivor.blogspot.com

Speaking of stereotypes - unsure if this funny story falls under that category or just not knowing geography. Back for the Olympics in Atlanta (I think that was 96) well this was way before one could order tickets on the 'internet'. So my husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) was attending and he had to call an 800 number to request tickets for certain events. At the time he lived in New Mexico. When he called in the person on the other line said "sir, you need to call the international line for tickets for New Mexico" he was puzzled..then realized the person on the line thought New Mexico was part of Mexico. He had to give her a geography lesson and explain that New Mexico is a state here in the U.S. Apparently, this occurred with several New Mexican's who had called in throughout the Olympics. It became soo humourous a few New Mexican's decided to establish a New Mexico Consulate while there (of course just as a joke) as each time they called in the person on the other line thought NM was out of the country. So - uncertain if this is stereotyping or uneducated geography people? Too funny.

LisaMommy is a discussion leader in Paradise Valley/Scottsdale area for arizonamoms.com. Her two boys are ages 5 months and 3 years old.

My kids were lucky to grow up as Air Force brats in Germany. Many of their friends were a mixture of ethnicities and races, so my kids grew up describing their friend as "you know, the one who has medium skin and curlier hair" etc., They never referenced any of their friends by what race they belonged to because they were all just kids. After moving back to the states, I divorced and started to date again. Not knowing what they had "learned" from their new friends here in Az, I asked my older sons what they thought about me dating a black man, I was happy to have both of them look at me like I was crazy to even ask such a question, they honestly didn't understand why I would ask that question. My 8 year old was a little concerned, but I explained nobody has the exact same hair/skin/features and pointed out how diverse all the "white" kids in his class were. It is sad that kids have to learn to categorize people, but I am lucky that mine haven't

I am not sure it was so much a stereotype in this particular case although I truly agree they exist! Based on their age, it sounds like they were shocked that you broke their secret code! To them, Spanish was their "private" means of communication and now they know you are a decoder!

I have always been fascinated by the flowing sound of Spanish and used to mimic my parents, my grandparents, various family members (who all spoke Spanish). I remember picking up the phone to listen in on the line just to hear the words and see what I could figure out! I speak Spanish with my husband quite frequently - intentionally in front of our children to hopefully inspire them to be bilingual.

BTW, since we are talking about how our looks can cause us to be judged by our cover- my skin is light brown, easy to tan, yet my "color" is usually attributed to my father's heritage based on my maiden last name. That is until somebody sees me with my mother, at which time they immediately proclaim, "I didn't know you're a Mexican," like it's some prize-winning discovery.

At this point in my life, I find it amusing but it used to really bother me.

Mouse_tales is a discussion leader in the East Valley for arizonamoms.com. She is a business owner, community volunteer, and aspiring runner (whew!), who most enjoys her roles as wife & mom. Her children range in age from 4 to 13.

I find it frustrating that companies (telemarketing) stereotype as well. My last name is Hispanic (as I am) but a lot of mail comes in spanish. Do I speak spanish? Not well and surely can't read it. These companies assume I can read spanish. Quite frustrating...

There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one!