Motherly advice

I still roll my eyes... :) !
The best advice I have given my son is " To love yourself " !

Sometimes I frighten myself (all in a good way) as I find myself saying things to my kiddo that my mom would tell me. I can't think of a specific thing right now...but just in general...having respect for oneself and others in all aspects of life, that along with having confidence in all we do. Those are just a few things my mom passed along...there are many phrases and words of advice she used to give my brother and I encouragement and praise. The one thing I admire most of my mom is that she has a strong spiritual connection.

LisaMommy is a discussion leader in Paradise Valley/Scottsdale area for arizonamoms.com. Her two boys are ages 5 months and 3 years old.

The best advice came from my mom's mom, Mama Angela, as we grandkids called her. While it's not original, she would often tell us, "If you're going to do something, do it well. Or don't do it at all." I truly believe that to this day and while at times it's challenging to do things well, I still try.

Mom's advice to us girls was to learn to stand on our own two feet first. She said that would make us better spouses.

aprodz25 is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com. She and her husband live in Phoenix and are raising a 4-year-old son they adopted as an infant.

My three children constantly roll their eyes when I say, "You need to lift each other up and support each other, because their are too many people out there who will try to bring you down, but you should always be their for your siblings."

My Mom use to tell me I wouldn't understand until I had kids of my own. And she was absolutely, positively, 100% right!!!You really don't "get it" until you have and love kids of your own.

Paz

I got bucked off from one of my horses I had back in my teenage years right in the middle of a horse show. Knocked the wind out of me for a bit. After that I became a bit hysterical. At the same time, my mom kept her cool while everybody in the stands were a bit dramatic which really surprised me...

Later I asked her what was the deal with the calmness...

She answered "When things like that happens, I automatically put my emotions in the back seat and drive through the scare straight and everything comes out fine."

I never understood that until I was old enough to get out in the real world. It came and still comes in handy :)

H~

I have one phrase only that I really try to teach my kids. I tell them on a daily basis that they need to follow what they know is right in their heart. This last couple of years have been trying and hard for my son especially but I'm hoping that as long as I can teach him to do the "right thing" he will always end up on top.

My mom's advice was ok, but nothing really stands out except for the whole "shut the door, you weren't born in a barn" lol...I say this a lot to my kids and my husband!

"It's not to late to become who you've always wanted to be..."

My mom...

She always told us to get up and take a shower when we were sick. "It might make you feel better. It might not, but at least you'll be clean".

Silly, but we follow this advice and the deeper meaning behind it. Whenever something is "wrong", take action.

My mom also had one of two answer to any question related to time, such as, "When will we get there?...When will dinner be ready?..When are we going to get a new couch?...When can I take horseback riding lessons?...etc." The answers were either, "Mere minutes!" or "In the Spring". Over the years, we came to understand that good things come to those who wait, so to speak. My mom taught us a "can do" attitude, an optimism, that carries us through the most trying times. Afterall, there's always the Spring.

She examplified this by going back to school at 38, earning a degree in Computer Science and then a Masters in Telecommuinications and she became one of the first women, Cisco certified engineers. My mom has never seen a lemon that she couldn't turn to lemonaide and I strive to do the same and teach my children the same.

All of her specific advice on marriage (46 yrs and counting), kids, careers, etc. is blanketed with this worldview. Life isn't what you're trying to do between problems, it is the struggle. So the fact that it's hard doesn't matter anymore, as it just becomes a series of issues to resolve, a challenge to your creativity. With this worldview, it's literally impossible to be depressed. My mom is amazing and I'm so thankful for her. If I'm a good mom, it's because of her.

Even though my mom died 14 years ago, I still hear her say (and pass along to my kids) . . .

"if you're gonna do something you don't want me to find out about, don't do it" . . . .

"don't tell me you're sorry, show me you're sorry by not doing it again" . . . .

"don't talk about other people, it will always come back at you when you least expect it" (and it ALWAYS has someone has always known SOMEONE I talk with and it gets back to them) . . .

"If you always want your man to come home to you, look nice when he comes home" (I know that sounds sexist, but I think it is just common courtesy to look nice for the person you love--even on the worst of days, I made sure I was at least showered and had my hair combed!! . . .and the same goes for him to look nice for me)

and last but not least . . .

"Bend over and follow through" (bowling advice, if I don't stop and "listen" to her say that before I throw the ball, I won't get a strike")