Saying no to having kids

I hope it was just a poor choice of words on Mariah's part. Maybe she has very valid reasons, and if she does it just isn't anyone's business.

There are two women in my life I am very close to who never had children, and I have never felt comfortable asking them why. It is a very personal choice, and I think if someone wants to share it with you, they will, otherwise, it may be better left unsaid. It may even be that it wasn't by choice and it is just too painful to talk about. We shouldn't judge what we have no knowledge of.

Susan & Neil Hampton have three spectacular children, Alexander, Isabel and David, plus one amazing teenager, Eric. Susan does community outreach for arizonamoms.com.
“In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt.” - Margaret Atwood

But she also went on to say she would have kids if her situation was right. Coming from a broken home she didn't want the same for her kids if she were ever to have them.

I'm pregnant right now and sometimes I feel like he's taken over! So I can understand where she's coming from though I would have said it differently.

We have to remember that we're dealing with Mariah Scarey here.

This is the same woman who said:

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean, I’d love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

It is better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not.

I always knew that I didn't want children until I was ready to give up everything and put the child first, but after waiting 36 years, my husband and I discuss and wonder how did we make it through life this long without him.
I don't think a person without children realizes just how incredible the love of a child is until he or she experiences a birth. We thought our dogs were our children and they were treated better than children, but after the birth of our child, it is amazing how nothing else seems to be important.
I believe if she really found a special person in her life, maybe she would reconsider. Before meeting my husband, I had no intentions of having children either.

One Happy Mom in Arizona.

Wow. Such a diva. I wasn't expecting to have a child either and wahla!! Here we are. I'm glad I had my daughter. She has changed my entire world, and I couldn't be happier. Sure the finances are difficult with childcare, and I don't have time to even pluck my eyebrows like I want too, but you know. I'm so blessed to have my daughter in my life. No matter what situation comes at me she is my constant light in a hard unforgiving world. I couldn't ask for anything more than that.

Lisa - Mom to her spunky little Scarlette

I know not everyone can have kids and others to choose not to, but for me, I don't think I would be half the human I am without them.
They make me kinder, more loving, more teachable and interesting in learning, more focused on the environment politics, and the future. I'm glad I don't know who I would have been; they've made me more of who I was meant to be.

Brooke Romney is an unbalanced mom of three young boys who constantly has too much to do, and too little time. She writes the Mom Beat column for The Gilbert Republic.

Talent aside, I've always thought of her as sort-of a weird-o....so an odd comment coming from her does not startle me!

On that subject....one of the best books I've read in ages (and a super easy, chick lit, summer beach read!) was a book I bought on the cheap at Costco - BabyProof. Too funny. Girl doesn't want kids, marries a guy who feels the same way. By Chapter 3, he changes his mind....they get divorced! Meanwhile, all along her poor sister is going through in-vitro and everything else to conceive.
Great story on that subject!!!

Happy2BMommy, is a stay-at-home mom who just turned 40 (argh!) with a 6 yr. old daughter and a 4 yr. old son, and is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com living in Scottsdale.

Everyone has their own opinion on whether or not to have children. But come on, to call them a violation? That is being dramatic. A violation is when someone breaks into your home or you are physically violated (raped). Having children is a blessing, but I'm sure there are people without children that feel just as blessed.

Having 3 kids I can totally relate to many of your comments. Yes, when you are pregnant, many times you feel like your body is being taken over by an invasion of the "body snatchers."-but not violated. I would have to say that there are days that I feel as though my personal life is non-existent in the fact that I don't have any time to myself. But that is the decision I made when I had children and although there are times, that I just need "mommy" time, I would never use the term that my children are violating me. I would agree with another mom who posted earlier that you save the word "violated" for something horrible, like, burglary, molestation, rape, etc.

Jomama is a full time mama to Jordan-6, Matthew-3, and Madison-16 mos while holding down a full time job and loves every minute of her crazy days.

Violated is probably just a poor word choice, though a friend who does not have children - and never wants to - has said to me that she wouldn't want her life "invaded.'' Same sentiment I guess.

Susie is a discussion leader in the east valley for arizonamoms.com. She has two sons, ages 6 and 2.

I think MC is weird and what a strange way to put that. My best friend has never wanted kids. I remember in the 4th grade we were talking about how we would always be best friends and how we would always live next door to each other and that our husbands would have to be best friends and I said that our kids could be best friends. She stopped me and joked "no, your kids can come play at my house but I'm not having kids".. She was 9 yrs old and she knew it wasn't something she wanted. To this day she loves kids but doesn't want any. It's who she is and she is a great person she just doesn't want to be a mom. I couldn't ever imagine my life without mine 3 kids and even at 9 I knew I would have them. It's funny how some people choose not to become parents and some do. I don't know what makes one choose not to but I respect her for it.

Elizabeth is a discussion leader for arizonamoms she writes about everything from her needing mommy advice to crazy and silly stuff that happens. She lives in the West Valley with her husband and 3 children, Joshua 12, Brooke 2 and Mason 10 months