I have had a lot of crazy things happen with people (strangers) lately and wanted to know how you all would have handled this.
I was at Costco yesterday with my 10 month old son in the front seat of the shopping cart. I was going toward the formula section. This woman had just walked out of the bathroom and started to approach my son and I. She was mentioning how cute my son was. I thanked her and continued on my way. This woman followed me, stopped my cart, and started going toward my son as if she were going to pinch his cheeks. I politely moved her hand away and asked her to please not touch him. She gave me a very disgusted look and snapped, "I don't have cooties" I said.."Mam, I don't care if you have cooties or not, I would prefer if you refrained from touching my son, please." She was really offended and snapped again that she didn't have cooties. I replied again that I didn't care if she had them or not, that he is my son and I don't want her touching him. She started yelling at me and it was upsetting my son. Rather than argue with her, I just walked away. I do have to admit. I am weird about germs and such...but in my defense, this lady just walked out of the bathroom. How do I know where her hands have been or if she even washed them before wanting to touch my son.
How would you have handled this?
♥ "LIFE AIN'T ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL, BUT IT'S A BEAUTIFUL RIDE" ♥--Gary Alan
You know, I have to agree
You know, I have to agree with you, I am Hispanic and there are many old wise tales that if you don't let someone touch the baby when they stare at them then the baby gets sick.
Well I am very germ phobic and no one is coming near my child unless you are related to her.
How dare that woman scream at you, 1. it is your child 2. She is a complete stranger WHO JUST CAME OUT OF THE BATHROOM!!!!!! And she has the Audacity to snap at you.
Chrissy
Mom of a beautiful 4 year old daughter!
~~~In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.~~~~~~
Exactly, that was a "rule"
Exactly, that was a "rule" in our house back in the day. haha. Now a days, you can't just trust anyone.
There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one!
Next time tell them that you
Next time tell them that you are trying to teach your child stranger danger. He can't be touched by everyone he sees it's a safety issue. Germs aside I don't touch kids I don't know unless I know the parents, or if they come up to me at the in home daycare that my child goes too. Kind of hard since they are all trying to clobber me with hi's and byes.
Or next time I would just walk away after the first time she started whining about it. That's your baby, and don't give a second thought to it.
Lisa - Mom to her spunky little Scarlette
I completely know what you
I completely know what you mean!
You never know. It's gross to think about all the things out of our control that our kids come in contact with on a daily basis, but good for you for taking a stand. And too bad for the cootie lady for taking offense!!!
LOL...that was great...the
LOL...that was great...the cootie lady. That's hilarious. Thanks for brightening up my day! =0)
♥ "LIFE AIN'T ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL, BUT IT'S A BEAUTIFUL RIDE" ♥--Gary Alan
I was in the grocery store
I was in the grocery store once when a couple approached my daughter and i. My daughter was old enough to be sitting up by herself in the grocery cart. For some reason, the man scared my daughter and she started crying. (all he was doing was smiling at her, he didn't say a word) He walked off and the woman hung around saying over and over "the big scary man is gone!". She continued to talk to her and then out of no where leaned over and kissed my daughter on the cheek. I was shocked and it all happened so fast!! I turned to t he next aisle and whipped out a baby wipe to clean her cheek. And i will admit, i am a bit of a germ-a-phobe! You would think with my daughters reaction to the "big scary man" this stranger would not have attempted to get that close to my daughter. But she did.
It was February or March of this year and all i could think was i hope that woman doesn't have a cold. My daughter never got sick, but i don't know why some feel they need to touch the baby.
just~me
I never like strangers
I never like strangers touching my kids when they were young, either. I'm with you, it's all about hygeine!
I think if I were in the "Costco situation" you were in, when the lady shouted, "I don't have cooties!" I would have shouted back, "Well, my kids DO have cooties, and I'd hate for them to spread it to you!"
Then I'd make a hasty get away!
New to AZ --- still working out the kinks!
Good for you ! Yes, you
Good for you ! Yes, you don't know if her hands were clean or not but you still don't want anyone you don't know touching your child!
I too, have a problem with germs but aside from that; I would've done the same thing without a doubt!
You just can't trust people and especially when it comes to our babies!
Sashaymom
I like the Stranger Danger
I like the Stranger Danger explination. I'd be pretty grossed out if someone did that to my daughter too.
In fat, that's so strange to me, I'd quickly remove myself from the general vicinty of the person rather than even explain myself. Someone with such bad sense of boundaries probably won't change with my explination anyhow.
I wonder what was going on with that crying lady. As crazy as she was - I sure do hope she is OK. Maybe she lost a child.
I totally agree, who just
I totally agree, who just walks up to other people's children and touches their faces? Creepy. This woman should have been embarrased at your reaction not defensive. You just don't do that nowadays. I am sure her intentions were not malicious but I just don't trust people.
I can't tell you how many times I have been in the restroom and people just don't wash their hands. I was at a restaurant once and although not inside the restroom, a server sneezed into his hands and didn't think anything of it. Walked right up to a table and began taking their order. Gross!!
Also, there was a segment on Good Morning America where they tested lemon slices that go into customers h20 and cocktails and a huge percentage of them from many different restaurants had fecal matter or e.coli on them. Gross!!
Sorry for grossing anyone out.
I knew there was a reason i
I knew there was a reason i dont like lemon in my drinks lol ..ewwww
**Whatever it is..Wrap it up in Love and the Possibilities are Endless**
Yeah that just totally
Yeah that just totally ruined my ice tea experience :-(
Lisa - Mom to her spunky little Scarlette
I have had the same issue!
I have had the same issue! my sister and i were waiting for our table to be ready so we could grab some brunch. Some lady comes up and just puts her hand on my kid!! I looked at her and said excuse me but i dont know you so i would appriciate it if you would get your hands off my kid!!
Who the heck thinks its ok to touch other peoples kids, do they go up and touch other adults?? If they did they would get arrested!
i think you handled the situation extremly well! Bravo!
How about your belly while
How about your belly while you were pregnant? I had a lady come up to me and ask how far along i was and put both hands around my stomach!! I don't know what it is with people, they just dont know how to respect "the bubble"
**Whatever it is..Wrap it up in Love and the Possibilities are Endless**
I am with you on that!!
I am with you on that!! Gross!!! Freaks me out.
Anna - mama of Joshua, Isabella, Sofia and Israel
I would have done what you
I would have done what you did. Maybe not those words, not sure what I would say but she was out of line. I agree, what is it with people thinking they can come into your space. Remember Seinfeld and the close talker? Give me my space and respect my child's space while you are at it!
KarilouMomof2 is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com living in Tempe. Her daughters are 9 and 6.
i had a similar issue when
i had a similar issue when my daughter was 2.
We were in Petsmart picking up food for our cat (I had my 4 year and 11 month old daughters with me as well).
there was a lady (probably in her mid 40's) walking around the store and she saw my daughter toddling behind me. she followed us, commenting on how cute she was (fortunately, I had my 11 month old in my arms and my 4 year was walking in front of me). Then out of nowhere, she picked my daughter up and made the attempt to walk towards the fish tanks to show her the "pretty fish"!! I went CRAZY!! I handed my baby to a store employee who happened to be standing there and snatched my toddler out of her arms yelling at her to never touch my daughter again. She seemed offended saying she was just going to show her the fish. my comment to her was " I don't know you from Adam and you just walked off with my baby!!" "at your age I would certaintly hope you know better than to take someone's child w/out permission." My daughter was crying at this point b/c she was scared this woman had grabbed her and could also tell I was upset. The woman aplogized and quickly left the store. The employee handed back my baby and even apologized for not helping me (it wasn't his fault)!! He even agreed that it was incredibly out of line for her to do that. I thanked him for taking my baby and we finished our trip but I was shaken for a good couple of hours afterwards.
People these days have no respect!! I don't know why some seem to think it's ok to just touch someone else's child w/out asking. All 3 of my girls know that they aren't allowed to touch another child w/out asking (even my 9 month old niece). I'm a germ-phobe too!!
"live...laugh....love"
Angie
I have a thing about people
I have a thing about people touching my children as well. When they were under 1 yrs old, I offended many a friend and family by handing the hand sanitizer out before they could hold my kids.
Once they were older I just told people they were shy (the truth) and didn’t like to be touched by strangers.
Now they are six and I would defiantly use the teaching stranger danger line.
Maybe the lady just had good intentions in her heart and she got her feelings hurt at your response? That doesn't mean you or any parent doesn't have the right to make that request, it just means maybe the delivery needs to be worked on?
I know sometimes I see such a cute child and I have to remind myself not to touch, but like the other mom said who knows what has happened to that lady to make her think it was ok??
At least you stood up for yourself.
bookworm_mom ~ mommy of twins
I remember when my sons were
I remember when my sons were babies and strangers always wanted to touch them. it was well intentioned but i wasn't crazy about it.
I think it's your right to keep people's hands away but i'm wondering if you could have handled it a bit differently. Maybe say something like (even though this is a white lie), "I'd rather that you didn't touch him. He's just getting over the flu and I'm trying to keep him from getting any other bugs.''
That gets your message across, and doesn't sound as harsh as "please refrain from ......''
Susie is a discussion leader in the east valley for arizonamoms.com. She has two sons, ages 7 and 3.