I have A 3 1/2 year old daughter that loves to "touch" herself. It has been going on for about A year now and I try to get her to understand that it is only appropriate to do that in "private," but she sticks her hands down her pants even when we are in public and rubs on my leg if we are laying on the couch watching tv. I don't want her to think that exploration of her body is A bad thing to do, but what I do want her to understand is to not do it directly in front of the public eye or to rub on mommy. Any suggestions, besides a permanent one piece onsie?
By the way, I have no idea why it is saying that I am putting in an inappropriate term every time I use the first letter of the alphabet.
Not being unsympathetic to
Not being unsympathetic to your problem, but I am so glad to hear another mom has had this same problem! My daughter had that same problem when she was that age. It really freaked me out a bit while we were going through that phase, because she continuously would "explore" or grab herself anytime, whether at home, in daycare or in public. What we ended up doing is just explaining to her, like you have done, when the appropriate time is to do this, and then ignore it when she did do it. Eventually the phase passed and we haven't had a problem with it since. I think it's just an age where kids notice their body and explore, but don't understand why it's not appropriate at certain times/placed. I just say hang in there, try to ignore it, and it will pass :)
Thank you, it is nice to
Thank you, it is nice to know that I am not alone.
After reading another post
After reading another post like this one (though about a boy the same age), I looked through a book I have called "From Diapers to Dating." by Debra Haffner. "A Parent's GUide to raising sexually healthy children. It helped me with my first two children as they were normal in touching themselves, in varying degrees.
Basically it says to do what you are doing, explain that you understand that feels good, but that touching yourself or rubbing is something that is done in private. I think you are right on target. The other thing she stresses is to try not to look at it through adult eyes, it is doubtful any of them is doing this out of eroticism, (if they are, it is a sign of sexual abuse, btw), instead they are doing something that feels good. It will take a while for them to get used to the idea of private moments, but they do. Although sometimes it takes a lot of reminding. Good luck! I'm sure I'll be going though it again soon.
Lovemy4 is a discussion leader for North Central Phoenix, tired mother of 4 great kids and wife to one great husband.
Thank you, I hope she gets
Thank you, I hope she gets past this phase, or as you said, learns when the appropriate "private" moment is.