Bedtime routine getting too long

I don't have a child this age yet,but I just saw the Super Nanny last night and the topic was about getting your kids to sleep in their beds. She told the parents to explain the bedtime routine and tell them where they are going to sleep. Then when it is time to put her in bed, yo uput her there and leave. When she comes out, you say "bedtime honey" and place her back in bed. The 2nd time she comes out, you say"bedtime," and place her back in. The 3rd time you say nothing and put her back in bed. You may have to do this over and over until she finally goes to sleep. It will probably be exhausting, but I have see the nanny do this with alot of families and it sure looks like it works! Good Luck!

OMG, you're spying in my house! LOL.

We're dealing with the same issue (minus the 18yr old sister). Our almost 3yr old son dawdles getting jammies on and brushing teeth, then we read. He sleeps on a crib/toddler mattress on the floor in a pup tent, and I have to lie just outside the pup tent. I am also 27wks pregnant, so I feel your pain.

What I have begun doing is to lie there for some amount of time, but not until he is asleep, and then leaving the door open a crack when I leave (and of course kissing him goodnight before I leave). The first few times I did it, I made up an excuse, Mommy has to pee, or Mommy's hips hurt (I've had some back pain this pregnancy). But anymore I don't bother. The plan is to shorten the time I stay, until it's just a minute or 2. He's been pretty excepting of it. He's gotten up a few times to use the bathroom or to tell me his covers need readjusting (why he can't do that himself confuses me), but he's been pretty good about it. Before I go to bed, I check that he's on his mattress under the covers, and I shut the door.

So if anyone has a faster/better way to do it, I'd be interested. And if anyone knows how to stop the dawdling at bedtime (or for that matter anytime - mine's a dawdler), I'd be interested in that too.

I made the mistake of putting my first born in my bed with me in the begining. When I started trying to put him in his bed he made me lay with him until he fell asleep but he would always come in my room in the middle of the night and we would do it again. I got really tired of spending most of my time in his bed so what I did was I put a bunch of pillows on the floor next to my bed and held his hand until he fell asleep. This way I could fall asleep and not worry about it, when I would see him slepping I would carry him into his bed and if he woke up in the middle of the night he would just lay on the pillows and hold my hand.
About the bed thing, maybe if you go tot the store and ask her to pick out a "special" blanket or pillow or something along those lines to put on her "special new bed" so maybe it will more appealing to her.

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Mommy of 2 wild boys and love every minute of it.

We used to have the same problem with my son. I used to sit in his room on the floor after we read stories and sometimes would be in there for up to an hour. I finally got sick of it and started transitioning out. Sitting farther away from the bed, etc. and after a few days we would just tuck him in and leave after story time. He would come to his door several times a night for the first week and we would just put him back in bed without saying much and leave. After about 2 weeks he just started staying in bed. Occassionally he will come to his door but never more than once and it is pretty rare when he does.

It was a hard two weeks but it is worth it...plus it gave my husband and I some time together again.

This won't be easy to change but you've got to get the bedtime routine under control before baby #2 comes. there's no way you'll be able to juggle the newborn and her night time routine.
I don't think the floor thing is a big deal - if she likes it, that's fine. I'd start the routine a bit earlier - say 7:30. spend 15-20 minutes total reading, doing flash cards, etc. Then give her a short snuggle and then leave. She needs to fall asleep on her own.
She's going to have a fit but just keep at it. Consistency is key.

Susie is a discussion leader in the east valley for arizonamoms.com. She has two sons, ages 7 and 3.

Oh gosh - hang in there. I know how hard it is to put them to sleep for naps or nighttime when pregnant. It is exhausting and difficult (physically). I know towards the end of my pregnancy my son could not sit on my lap anymore as my tummy was so big. I felt so sad for him - so we just sat in his bed for book time. I think talking to your child and creating the expectation then slowly over the next week working on that expectation is best. My 3 year old goes through cycles. First he is fine and sleeps in his bed with no problems, then suddenly one day he appears by my bed at 3am and wants to lay in bed between my hubby and I. Once we allow it well then we must start over again and get him accustom to his own bed. It's a constant cycle every 30-60 days. The only thing is that he rarely goes to our room unless he is truly scared (like a nightmare) other times he just yells out for us. He will not leave his bed unless either I or my hubby comes to him - again with the exception of a nightmare (so we typically don't have that 'go back to your room problem'). Just try what you think would work for your daughter. I'd do it sooner versus later because once the baby arrives believe me it gets harder to master the nighttime ritual. Today was the first time I actually found both my boys napping at the same time (for only 45 minutes) any my baby is 5 months old. Hang in there! Sometimes it gets a bit hard before it gets easier to change their habits.

LisaMommy is a 38 year old discussion leader for arizonamoms.com from the Paradise Valley/Scottsdale area. Her two boys are ages 9 months and 3 years old.

I would recommend transitioning her to her new room and new bed now. You can also implement your other change at the same time (you not staying until she falls asleep). My daughter started climbing out of her crib at 17 months, so I moved her into her new room and toddler bed because I was due with #2 in 4 months. You have just 8 weeks before the baby comes and you don't want her to have a new bed, new room, new baby and everything all at once. It will be hard, but I found that my child adapted after 2 days to her new surroundings. Like an earlier post said, have her pick out a special big girl blanket, etc., make a big deal about her being a big girl, then read, put her in bed and leave. She will come out a million times the first night and you will just have to put her back to bed over and over. But it will get better each night. She'll probably be sleeping on her own in a few days. It will be hard to see her sad, but you can still put her to bed lovingly although firmly. Just try not to lose your patience! It will be worth it to have this behind you when you have a new baby to deal with! Let us know how it goes!

Hobbymommy, 38, is a discussion leader from Mesa. She is a happy stay-at-home mommy to a 3-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son.

I hear you. On one hand you want to accomodate him but on the other hand you are exhausted. I think you are correct, it's not sustaibale for him to continue to fall asleap in this way. My routine with my seven year old takes about 45 minutes but that includes hygene, changing, putting clothes out for the next day, etc. Just know that you are a great mom for teaching him how to fall asleap on his own - he's already learning how to be a great big brother!