How do I get my 5 year old to stay in bed?

I had the same problem with my son when he was 5, though he wasn't as persistent, usually he would just get up once a night.

Here's what worked for him: You know those tacky moving pictures that they sell in the mall? They're of waterfalls, oceans, etc., lit from behind with sounds of crashing waves or birds twittering. Well, Sawyer had always wanted one of those, falling to his knees at the kiosk in worship every time we went to the mall.

My mom bought him one for Christmas that year. (They can run $100.) He's 9 now, and I think he's only shown up at my bedside two or three times since then. It worked brilliantly because it provides some white noise as well as a night light.

Karina Bland is raising her 9-year-old son in Tempe with a lot of love, humor and support from her friends and family. A longtime journalist covering child welfare and education issues for The Arizona Republic, she blogs about raising good kids.

I've been debating about seeking advice for my 4.5 year old on the same subject. He was doing great at night until the battery on a smoke alarm went dead, causing them all to go off and waking him up. It was morning, but he hates loud noises and it traumatized him. We now have a hard time getting him to sleep without someone sitting with him, and if he wakes up at night, he heads straight for our bed.

A fan and night lights haven't helped him, and we, too are guilty of caving in for the sake of sleep. I've given in to the fact that we'll have to deal with it with some discipline, consistency, and a little tough love (you're doing better than we are getting her back to bed). I just haven't worked up my own discipline yet to do it.

At least you can know that you're not alone. Good luck!

GopherGirl is a discussion follower. She lives in the West Valley with her husband and two boys, ages 4 and 2.

My three year old son is the same way. Sometimes he just wants to be in bed with us and other times he is really scared. So, we've done a combination of things. My husband always says "it time to Ferberize again" (at age 3?? dont know if you can quite call it that?? I guess he is just referring to the many things we try to help our son sleep better.) Anyhow, it seems like we go through this pattern often (so maybe it doesnt work?? but it works for a short time we find until it cycle's thru again.) So, one of us will go lay down with him then sneak back to our bed once he is asleep. Then for nightmares I came up with my 'mommy spray' it gets rid of all scary creatures or nightmares. I just pretend I'm spraying an aerosol and make the noise 'shhhh'. He loves that & it seems to work. After a few days of cuddling with him when he calls us...we then go to discussing with him that everything is okay....and our expectation of him. That one usually takes a few visits throughout the night. However, by the end of the week he is fine and does not want to sleep in our bed. That tends to be the case for a few weeks until he either gets sick, or appears in our bed one night. It is a constant situation....but each month varies. I have no idea if there is really a 'solution' I think as parents we just have to keep trying different things that help our kids sleep. I know what you are going through - as our eldest son has never been a good sleeper (except for naps - we say 'goodnight' and he stays in his room/bed until he falls asleep (for some reason nights dont work that way!) Hmm. Now, we have baby #2 I sure hope he is a better sleeper. It's funny because ever since my oldest son was a baby (and did not like sleeping much) I would pray (yes - in my prayers) that he'd get a good nights rest. That is how difficult it was with sleeping - I was desperate. So - try different things - I wish I had the solution to help resolve this dilemma many of us have.

LisaMommy is a 38 year old discussion leader for arizonamoms.com from the Paradise Valley/Scottsdale area. Her two boys are ages 7 months and 3 years old.

Maybe create a fun place for her to sleep in her room. My son often sleeps on a little pop up tent on the floor, or one of those kids couch that turn into a bed. Sometimes we take him to pick out a new pillow or fun sheets for him to sleep in. We also bought him a radio that plays nature sounds, beach sounds etc..

Both my daughter and son went through this when they were about 3 & 5 (try sleeping with four in a bed!!). I tried a chart on the refrigerator with stars for every night they slept in their own beds. They were promised a treat (either a special meal or a new book - I can't remember) if they got 5 stars in a row. It must have worked because they sleep pretty well in their beds now (though occasionally they do wake us up - but I guess that's normal).

Lattemom is the mother of three energetic kids ages 6, 8 & 11 and a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com.

I know that my solution will not be popular, but we bought a king sized bed, and scooted over! It won't be forever, and it gives them such security. They start in their beds and usually show up in our room somewhere between 3-5am. Sometimes, they make it all night in their beds, but usually not. I remember being a kid and my dad refused to let us climb in their bed. So, I would sneak downstairs and sleep with the dog on the couch. Eventually, my brain valued sleep over worrying, and I assume that my kids will be the same way. I'm grateful to have a husband who is understanding.

"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein

Thanks for all the ideas, I will let you all know what works!

Susan is mom to Alexander, Isabel, David and stepmom to Eric. She does community outreach for arizonamoms. Be sure to enter the Back-to-School $1000 Giveaway every day July 4-31!

A friend of mine put a mattress on the floor of their room, then moved it out a little each week. Their chld was welcome to sleep on the mattress. Another friend did turn teh lock around on the door, which scares me a bit, but she said it worked.
We use a Conair sound machine, that helps my boys stay asleep through the little noises. Good luck!

Brooke Romney is an unbalanced mom of three young boys who constantly has too much to do, and too little time. She writes the Mom Beat column for The Gilbert Republic.

A little different take on the mattress...my sister let her daughter keep a sleeping bag in mom and dad's room. If she really needed to come and sleep in their room, she would lay on the floor in her sleeping bag, so at least mom and dad weren't disturbed. She was a little older though, I don't think that would work with a 3-year-old. Happy news is, she sleeps in her own bed now!

Hobbymommy, 38, is a discussion leader from Mesa. She is a happy stay-at-home mommy to a 3-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son.

Since everyone frowns at duct tape, we resorted to bribery with my son. He also was 5 at the time, and actually he is the one who thought up the idea. He was a big Lightning McQueen fan at the time, and he saw a Lightning McQueen alarm clock that he really wanted for his room. I told him I would not buy it for him, and he suggested that I buy it for him and give it to him when he started sleeping in his bed all night. We bought the clock, and I put it away in a drawer. I let him pick the night that he would sleep in his room all night. The first two nights, he told me he wasn't ready yet. The third night, he told me he was ready. And, he did it! I think he needed a little time to mentally prepare himself to do it. We presented the clock to him the next morning, and he's slept in his room ever since.

Our 4-year old would do the same thing. I told her that I work a lot of hours and need my sleep as she needs her sleep so if she wakes up in the middle of the night, there would be a mattress (crib size) on the floor that she could sleep on so she didn't wake me up. this worked out great! I would move the mattress a little further away from my bed each week and before you know it...she didn't get up!

There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one!