We have a great neighbor kid. Very polite, kind (8), I don't mind at all having him over, my concern is when he leaves our house, we have fed him dinner, he goes home to a house with his 11 year old sister being the only one home. I'll ask where his mother is, and he says he doesn't know, but I know that she has called him on his cell and told him to go home. I've met her and she seems very nice, and he is well cared for, good manners, etc. I met her before he started coming over, so I didn't get to ask her if she would rather we keep him until she gets home.
I'm just wondering: Do you think there is any liability on our part? We walk him back to his door. Why do I feel weird about leaving him? I was home alone in 2nd grade on occasion and nothing happened...
Lovemy4 is a discussion leader for North Central Phoenix, tired mother of 4 great kids and wife to one great husband.
I don't know whether there's
I don't know whether there's a liability on your part so I can't answer that. However, I think 8 years old is too young to be left alone for 10 minutes or 2 hours, etc. 8 years old is young, I can guarantee you if something life threatening happened, god forbid that 8 year old would panic. I believe the 11 year old would panic too. Regardless of the time of day, morning, afternoon, or night I don't agree it's right, but I think it's even riskier at night, kids are more tired after having a full day of school and play and aren't aware of things as well as they should be, etc. I just plain don't agree it's okay to leave an 8 year old or an 11 year old home alone, just my opinion!!
Agreed. I dont think its
Agreed. I dont think its okay to leave a 8yr old at home alone. But its some one elses kid. and only should you interact if you feel its an emergency. ( i know , the mom comes out, no matter whos child it is)
When I was in second grade I
When I was in second grade I stayed home until my parents came home from work.I was usually scared.Times were diffrent then too.
I don't think there is a liability on your part.However being a mom I can understand feeling reluctant to send him home knowing his parents aren't home or a much older child.
My son is nine and I don't leave him alone.
How often are they left alone and for how long?
He's only come over for any
He's only come over for any length of time twice, so twice we've walked him home at about 6:30 - 7 p.m. and both times the mother has not been home. I can't see his house from mine, so I don't know anything about when the Mom gets in. I do know she is very good friends with her neighbor, so maybe the neighbor keeps a close eye out. I also know she is getting a divorce from the boy's step-father, so the Mom is the sole adult at this point.
Both times we had to make the boy wait until we were organized enough to walk him home (putting the babies in the stroller, etc.) he didn't seem to want to trouble us, and he was ready, willing and able to get home without our help. I asked him if his Mom could just pick him up at our house on her way home, but he didn't ask.
I think the boy is being raised right. The school bus stop is at our house and he brought our trash can in for us, without being asked! It just seems he's being raised differently than most of us are raising our kids in this age and I am a natural worrier...
Sounds like all of you have the same vibe, although I don't see what the options are. I'd rather he'd play at my house then be home alone, but that seems to mean dropping him home to a non adult supervised house. And I don't want to offend the Mom so that he isn't allowed to come over either.
Lovemy4 is a discussion leader for North Central Phoenix, tired mother of 4 great kids and wife to one great husband.
You don't say how you know
You don't say how you know the mom is getting a divorce, but if you talk to her anyway upon occasion, it might be a good excuse to offer support talk during this inevitably challenging time, and mention that if it would help her schedule, you would be happy to keep her child(ren) with you until she gets home...
Just a thought.