I've been participating in a story chat about a mid school where the administration outlawed hugs, and the students protested by crossing the street after school and hugging their friends and family. In that chat, there was at least one Mom who said that no adult better ever hug her kid because, no matter how long a person had been a teacher, s/he might still be a pervert. Because I'm so well-disciplined, I responded that I was going to sign up as a sub so that I could hug her kid twice.
Another poster said that nobody ever hugged a colleague at work, which I, again, refuted. I've got some colleagues that I don't see very often, and we're likely to hug one another hello and goodbye. If someone's shooting a picture, chances are that everybody's got an arm draped around somebody else.
A third poster said that kids shouldn't learn the difference between good touch and bad touch at school; kids should never, ever be touched at school -- not by any adult or any other child.
Of course, every time we put a child in someone else's care, we take a leap of faith in the person we're leaving in charge. Sure, there is (a very small) minority of people who slip through the cracks, and want access to children for the wrong reasons. That's not most people. Experts tell us that it's critical for infants and young children to get held, and for kids to get as much good touch as possible -- so that they have a framework against which they can object to bad touch.
So, Moms, would you approve or disapprove of a teacher who gave your child a hug for doing something terrific, or who consoled your child when s/he was crying? If your 11 year-old daughter wanted to hug her friend and her friend's Mom goodbye after a play date, would that make you uncomfortable? A lot of posters on that article seemed exceptionally uncomfortable about boys in mid school hugging or getting hugged.
What do you think about all that?
No, I think hugging whether
No, I think hugging whether you are a boy or girl is very important. People need human touch to be emotionally healthy. How can someone tell you that hugging is wrong? Now I agree that there are some people out there that want access to children for the wrong reasons, so we must be very diligent in our screening process as to who our children are close to, but no hugs, give me a break! I worry about the message it sends to children. It's almost as if affection is a dirty thing. I,for one, do not want my 2 year old son to ever feel that it is wrong to care for someone or to feel uncomfortable being tender and loving. Digusting! What next, no smiling because it might be suggestive in perverts mind......How much more unhappiness are we going to promote in this world?
I'm not sure I can fully
I'm not sure I can fully articulate how insane I think this story is. This country is becoming so politcally correct - we're becoming a backward society.
On a regular basis, I will often tell my child, who is in the fifth grade, to go give her first grade teacher a hug as were are walking by her after school - or her second grade teacher, or kindergarten. I believe we can't give ENOUGH hugs in this society.
Sure there are those people who slip through the cracks and seek to do harm. But to ban all hugs in the name of protection is overkill. Over time we will find we are raising a generation of kids who are afraid, detatched and anti-social.
sure, fine, whatever
Actually, hugging is
Actually, hugging is prohibited in most schools, but that's mainly to discourage the boyfriend/girlfriend thing. I remember in college (I became a teacher) the professors talked about affection and hugging and advised us all against it due to possible misconceptions. Teachers are afraid to hug their students because of the threat of something being taken the wrong way. It's sad, but true.
twinsmom, you've raised the
twinsmom, you've raised the essential point. As a society, we've let a relatively small number of creeps win.
Soon, I am going to start to share with my friends on AZMoms about my plans to go back into teaching. I'm excited about it, and I hope you all will be, too.
In all my time growing up, I
In all my time growing up, I have never had someone tell me that hugging was prohibited at school. In fact, judging by the amount of PDA going around, I don;t think there was a no affection policy.
How sad. I have no problem
How sad. I have no problem with my child getting a hug from a teacher. Maybe the people that are so opposed just didn't get hugged enough as children! LOL
Hobbymommy, 38, is a discussion leader from Mesa. She is a happy stay-at-home mommy to a 3-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son.
It's another "My Mom"ism,
It's another "My Mom"ism, but I only cite them because she's right: "I never thought that my children could ever have too many people who loved them." It goes along with one of my favorite "My Dad"isms: if you want to know if you're a good person, spend a little time with little kids. They'll let you know right off the bat what kind of heart you have."
My son comes from a huge
My son comes from a huge family who is always hugging I never thought twice about it. Whether it be family or his friends it's just the way he is he loves to hug people. He started school last year and needless to say I received a call on a weekly or every other day basis that he was hugging the kids and he needed to stop. After trying to explain that not everyone likes to be hugged I thought geez he could be hitting or biting people and they are complaining about hugging. After the 20th call I just told them that I didn't know what else to do I have talked to him finally I told them to call me if he was hurting or hitting people, after getting to know him they just realized that is the way he is.
You remind me of my
You remind me of my sister-in-law's family. Sadly, both her parents are gone now, but even with her sister, you just expect to kiss hello and goodbye. Her Mom told me that, if heaven forbid something happened, you wouldn't want to think that you had left him/her without a little love. Of course, before Miss Consuela would start her car, we had to have a little prayer to whatever Saint is in charge of Detroit. Darn, I miss her.