I was listening to the radio on my way to work yesterday and the topic was "what advice do you wish you had taken or would go back and tell your self at 17 now that you've experienced some of life?" I thought a lot about this. So much about this that here it is a day later and I'm posting it because I wonder what others would have said to themselves or plan on saying to their kids as that time approaches. Here was some advice I'd give myself if I could go back in time and what I plan on telling my kids when they getting ready to graduate (and even while they are in high school):
- Be true to yourself and your heart always.
- Remember it's not the quanity of friends you have, but the quality.
- Take your time growing up and don't be in such a rush to be a "grown up."
- You may only get some oppurtunities once so make sure you take them and relish in the experience. If it's a bad experience, learn from it and move forward.
I will be 36 when my son graduates from high school. As you can tell from my age, I had him quite young and missed out on plenty and wished someone had given me some of the advice I plan on passing on to him and my daughter. I never regretted the path I chose, but am realistic enough to know that I could have made my life a little easier by waiting to go down it. So my question is what advice do others wish they had or plan on giving to their kids.
"It's not to late to become who you've always wanted to be..."
Listen to the song "Letter
Listen to the song "Letter To Me" by Brad Paisley. That's one thing I love about country music - it can strike a chord.
Oddly, I think that I will
Oddly, I think that I will advice my kids to do exactly what I did:
- never, ever, ever, give up (there's no such thing as a sold out show, or a closed college class, if you want it!)
- embrace educational opportunities
- travel the world
- nurture a few quality friendships, over quantity
- strive to know thy self (analyze thoughts, feelings, actions and behaviors)
- forgive
- love people the way you love God or humanity - unconditionally
But, I will also advice them to do the things that I didn't do:
- invest!!!! Max out your 401K with your very first job. Buy property as soon as you can!
- force yourself past "anxiety" and shyness. "Fake it til you make it", because otherwise, you'll miss too much of life watching from the sidelines, "afraid". You get there anyway in your 30's, and only look back on wasted time!
- don't waste time trying to fit yourself into a career - do what you have a knack for and the job will emmerge. There are so many obsure jobs for every skill set, that you will only find by putting your particular skill set out there.
I plan to read, "The Road Less Traveled" to my sons when they reach 13.
"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein
These are a few things I
These are a few things I wish I had done:
finsh college - I have done fairly well without a degree, but I am getting to the level where I'll eventually hit a ceiling because I don't have an advanced degree
don't waste so much time trying to make this man or that man love you - it's like banging your head against a stone wall- it doesn't work, they normally aren't worth the effort, and if you invest that energy into yourself, developing your own hobbies, interests, chances are you'll be better off
keep your credit record clean - this is so important. I ruined my credit early on and it took years of hard work for me to get to the point where I am today. I was very irresponsible for most of my 20's.
be kind to your body - stay away from hard partying. I wasted so much money and time doing ridiculous, unhealthy things that I thought were "fun" at the time....and it has taken a toll on my overall health.
let go of anger - it will eat you alive if you don't
choose life! The abortion I had at 25 will haunt me till the day I die, as well it should.
travel - I wish I had taken more time to travel this great country - and the world - before settling down and having a child.
Even with all the mistakes I have made, though, that broken road led me to a pretty good place - I would not change a thing if there was the slightest chance I would not have my son.
Oh I definitely agree with
Oh I definitely agree with your last comment and I'm very happy with "who I am" even though I selected a lot tougher road sometimes. And to pick a different road, I never would have, my kids are who get me through my rough days!
"It's not to late to become who you've always wanted to be..."
It will be a question, "What
It will be a question, "What college are you attending?" and not the question, Are you going?
Always walk away from trouble.
Live everyday as if its your last.
Stand for what you believe.
One Happy Mom in Arizona.
I would tell myself "GO TO
I would tell myself "GO TO COLLEGE RIGHT OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL!!!"
I had the chance to go --- with scholarships to pay for it --- but thought I should 'see the world' for awhile. Then when I wanted to go back, it was so hard because by then I had to factor in bills, relationships, work --- all the 'grown up' things I did NOT HAVE when I graduated HS!!!
I finally did finish ---- going full time on and off or at night --- 11 years later! I'm glad I got my degree, but oh what could have been!
Also: I'd tell myself to invest in real estate and the stock market. Even with recent downturns, the return on a 1980 investment would be HUGE!!!!
We've been rowing the boat
We've been rowing the boat for 17-18 years, and, today, we're going to hand you the oars. We're here to crew, and, if need be, throw out a life preserver, while you get knack of it. But you've earned the right to be in charge of yourself, and we're so proud of you.
-Stay in-state for your
-Stay in-state for your first years of college!
-Get into going to the gym now while it's not painful
-Don't slack on school those first years, you can have fun AND get good grades
-Live in the dorms the first year of college
-Pick a different dress for Prom instead of that disaster you're thinking of getting
Wow - what a
Wow - what a thought-provoking question. Some thoughts that immediately come to mind:
1. Don't squish your feet into shoes that don't fit just because they are "cute." They really will ruin your feet like mom told you!
2. Don't ever date your best-friends ex-boyfriend (only did that once at 19 and quickly learned what a HUGE mistake it was)
3. If you lost everything you ever had, something that you can never loose is your college education. Don't ever stop until you are done!
4. Only cary ONE credit card, if possible, and DO NOT use one credit card to pay another
5. Wear your seatbelt every single time you go anywhere in a car
6. Admit your mistakes when you make them and learn from them the first time
7. Take good care of your skin and wear sun screen every day!
Mouse_tales is a discussion leader in the East Valley for arizonamoms.com. She is a business owner, community volunteer, and aspiring runner (whew!), who most enjoys her roles as wife & mom. Her children range in age from 4 to 13.
GO WITH YOUR GUT - LISTEN TO
GO WITH YOUR GUT - LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION
Take risks - don't be
Take risks - don't be afraid!
This is the best post ever! I'm sharing it with my senior.
Mom of teenage boys!