Park Protocol??? What would you have done...???

I think you handled it well. I would have done the same thing. You tried quite a few times to try and get him to stop,he was reaching out for attention,and kids like that will take any attention even negative.

Honestly?...Sigh....I would have pushed my daughter on the swings....

People are inconsiderate...sometimes, people are also just caught up in things...

That woman may have been chatting away mindlessly with a sister whom she speaks to everyday, or an old college roommate who just got her number, or with the nurse at her doctor's office getting her beta blood test results after an IVF procedure, or the car insurance adjuster about her accident, or her mom to get an update on her dad's chemotherapy, or or husband after a fight last night, or a friend wishing her happy birthday, or, or, or...

It's easy to feel so put out that we feel that we deserve a solution to what's bugging us immediately. But, sometimes, what's bugging us is our own inability to manage our frustrations.

That little boy got on your nerves. Or maybe his mom did. But, the poor kid was obviously bored and seeking attention. I'm not sure that he deserved to be intimidated by a strange lady. Of course, I'm commenting on the situation at hand and not projecting any extra thoughts.... about how he might be better off learning a thing or two, dag-na-pit, about sharing and respect, since his mother was too absent minded to teach him, etc. or any of the MANY places that we could go with this....Given the limited information that you knew, I would have chalked it up to teaching my daughter a lesson about flexibility and simply moved on...

"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein

Well done! I had an incident at the park this week as well. My children are 4 and 2 1/2 - I watch them like a hawk at the park. When we were at the park a 2nd and 1st grader were there - brother/sister, without any parents. Total tyrants, hurting one another which often lead to getting rough around my children. Many times I sked them to settle down or they would have to get off the equipment - they were kicking each other down the slide - and tried to do the same to my children. I tried to nice and friendly but I had enough!

Who sends their children to the park at that age by themselves. The boy was CLEARLY a wild child - his parents should know better than to turn their out of control child loose at the park. I have no problem stepping up and protecting my children.

The mother was clearly at fault for not telling her child to move - I always make sure my children practice park etiquette - it drives me crazy when parents just let them do whatever!

JenM

This happens all the time, kids in the 5-9 category, especially boys in my experience, are just rougher and wander around like they own the place.

I just say, "move, other kids are coming down the slide" in a very authorative tone, like a school teacher. Not mean, or w-itchy, but in a tone that says, "it is important that you do this now" and matter-of-factly. They always move. Even my little boy will try to get some negative attention when he thinks it's funny (like throwing things over the railing in the house), so it's pretty normal.

It's a shame that the mother was otherwise occupied, but that happens too, if not with a cell, than with another sibling. And the kid was just looking to get a rise out of you.

I think you handled it fine. I would have had my daughter still slide down and if he got hurt oh well :)

KarilouMomof2 is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com living in Tempe. Her daughters are 9 and 6.

I have had similar situations happen at the park. I usually don't have to get mean, but I think that it takes a village. Kids need to understand that they have to have respect for adults other than their parents. Sounds like the mother wasn't doing her job. I would hope that my child would behave better if I wasn't watching, but if I wasn't I would hope that the parent who was would remind him how to behave. I think you did the right thing!

Another middle-aged story ...

When we were kids, we had the run of the neighborhood, but, if we got out of line, the nearest adult would tell us to knock it off. Then we would beg him/her not to tell our Moms. Of course, if we scraped a knee, one of the neighbors would come out with a washcloth, Bactine, and a band-aid.

I can't imagine what would have happened if we had shown attitude or been disrespectful, but I'm sure we'd be reluctant to sit down for awhile. At the very least, we'd be marched down the street to apologize. Now, you hear kids saying, "You can't tell me what to do," and Moms saying, "You can't tell my kid what to do."

I've been known to smile and say, "Well, if you taught her some manners, I wouldn't need to, would I?" No black eyes so far ...

So, it occurs to me that, if we could all live in a neighborhood full of nosy, interfering neighbors, kids today could take off on their bikes after school and not show back up until supper time.

Wouldn't that be cool?

I think you did just fine. Hey, there is no perfect way to handle it, and your way worked!
Having two kids who constantly try to "call my bluff," I would have probably tried to call that kid's bluff. Saying something to him like "you'd better move, b/c here comes my kid. You don't want to get kicked in the face, do you?"
And then sent her (slowly and gently) right on down!

I'm sure he would've moved in plenty of time.....AND gotten the message!

And, yes, perhaps that mom had an important phone call, but you know what? she didn't have to be removed from the equipment parked on a bench. Her kid's safety and safety towards others was just as important.
I think it is a cop-out to think maybe her call was more important....Hey, if it was that important, she should have taken her son over to the bench and said "sit here, b/c Mommy has to talk on the phone right this second and can't watch you." And realistically, come on, that call probably wasn't THAT important! har har
Odds are - she was just lazy and using both the park AND YOU as her babysitter.

Happy2BMommy, is a stay-at-home mom who just turned 40 (argh!) with a 7 yr. old daughter and a 5 yr. old son, and is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com living in Scottsdale.

Good for you for what you did, I would have done the same thing. It too bothers me to see parents totally oblivious to what their kids are doing or where they even are when at the park. My daughter is 5 and while I could sit with in an eye's distance of her and watch what she's doing, I choose to be with her at all times and she's accustomed to me doing this so she likes this. I walk around with her and just wait patiently while she's climbing on something or I'll wait at the end of the slide for her to slide down. There have been many times when she's been waiting to slide down and there are kids trying to climb up the slide, that bugs me to no end. First off not only is a slide for sliding down, not climbing up, but it's dangerous too. I've personally made subtle comments to children doing this that slides are for sliding down not climbing up. When that hasn't worked and they insist on continuing to do it while my daughters waiting patiently at the top I'll make a remark like "well they're not being very friendly and not sharing that well are they". All the while their parents are either no where to be found or are sitting on a bench (inappropriate term) chatting on their cell phone or with a friend totally not paying attention to what's going on around them or with their child. I don't think you're the park bully at all ... these kids need some discipline and it's too bad their own parents won't bow down and do it. Kudo's to you!!!

This drives me crazy when parents let their kids climb up the slide instead of going up the steps and sliding down - it causes too many problems. I think you handled it well. I've been fed up before and used a firm voice with kids that wouldn't behave.

Susie is a discussion leader in the east valley for arizonamoms.com. She has two sons, ages 7 and 3.