All right, it's pool season, which means it's swimming suit season. Now, I'm happy that one pieces are back in a big way, but really, who wants the sides of your suit cut out so you can pinch my love handles with your eyes or for it to go so low that you can see in inches how many babies I've nursed? Ahhhh.
But, that's not the topic. I often see women who have obviously had a few babies wearing bikinis. Half of me wants to say, "I'm sure there is something that would make you feel so much better than that triangle top suit and barely there bottoms," and the other half wants to say, "You go girl--I wish I had that kind of confidence in myself to traipse around in almost nothing for all the world to see."
What do you think? Why are some of us SO consious of what our bodies look like while others throw caution to the wind, and how can I be more like the second group?
Brooke Romney is an unbalanced mom of three young boys who constantly has too much to do, and too little time. She writes the Mom Beat column for The Gilbert Republic.
This reminds me of a sermon
This reminds me of a sermon I once heard while attending church on a beach vacation. The pastor said:
"Yesterday, as I walked along the beach, I saw a teenage boy walking beside his mother, and she was wearing a tiny little bikini that --- for me --- was an occassion for prayer.
And that prayer was, 'Thank you, Lord, for sparing me from ever having to see MY mother dressed like THAT when I was a teenager!'"
I think his point was that modesty is important, especially to our kids when they're with us! That HAS to be a consideration at least when they get old enough to be humiliated by us!
New to AZ --- and missing autumn leaves and the smell of apple orchards!
I never wore a bikini when I
I never wore a bikini when I had the hot bod because I was and still am tomboyish. That being said, I absolutely hate seeing people wear swimsuits with fat spilling over the sides. Now, before someone jumps down my throat for that comment, I've born two babies, an ovary and eventually the whole baby-making machine which packed on the poundage. It would just be too uncomfortable to wear a bikini - both physically and mentally.
sure, fine, whatever
For me personally, i would
For me personally, i would not wear a bikini. Not even before my daughter was born. Just wouldn't be comfortable in one. Not even in the pool in my own backyard. LOL!!
However, i see nothing wrong with a woman or a mom in a bikini. If you have the body for a bikini and you feel good about your body and yourself, i say go for it. As long as it's done tastefully, meaning not too revealing and please not a thong!! (are those even comfortable? LOL!)
I don't have any advice on how to be more like the second group, but i will say go with what you are most comfortable with. I guess if that turns out to be a thong, i will just have to look the other way. ;0)
The recipe for perpetual ignorance is: be satisfied with your opinions and content with your knowledge.
~ Elbert Hubbard (1856 - 1915)
Part of me agrees with the
Part of me agrees with the "you go girl" attitude, the other part wonders how you have a house with no mirrors. Just like the bikini issue, if I could find my bellybutton I would have a bellybutton ring.......
I'm so grateful that I don't
I'm so grateful that I don't need to go to public pools to splash around (I'll take the kids for the slides, though). I swim in the privacy of my backyard.
At this point in my life, I'm definitely not comfortable in a bikini -even around family. A tankini, maybe -- after about 10,000 crunches. I'm definitely not going to get the monokini - with all those sexy cutouts in the places I want to hide.
I'm not overweight, but I'm not fit. And for me, I don't want anyone judging me for how I look. Nor do I want to subject anyone to how my stomach looks - all soft with stretch marks. (I do know someone who calls that a birthing battle scar - and "we should not to be embarrassed by it.") For the women that can do it, great. But it's not for me.
Arizona Moms Editor Yvette Armendariz shares stories about raising her kids and tips for busy parents in her Time-starved (goddess) Mom blog. She and her husband are raising two children, ages 8 and 11.
Personally, I think that
Personally, I think that just on pure aestheics, one piece suits are more simply more attractive. My husband agrees. A little mystery is a good thing. Seeing a woman's body outlined, but having to wonder exactly what's underneith is more attractive. It seems classier, and classy is attractive...to me...and my husband, anyway.
I'm sure that there are some though, that are not as attracted to "classy". Because I think this way, I tend to shake my head when I see a little girl/toddler in a bikini.
"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein
Just because someone has a
Just because someone has a different taste in clothing than you doesn't mean that they are not "classy." All things can be done in a way that is tasteful. There was a time that women who wore pants were considered to be classless.
Absolutely! That's why I
Absolutely! That's why I clearly stated that it was my personal taste. I thought the question was asking for a survey of others' taste and comfort level with a bikini. Perfect body or not, I simply think that one piece suits (actually, especially the ones with the sides cut out), are more "classy" looking and more attractive for any woman. The notion of "classy" definitely changes, as it will always be a social comparison. When most women wore shirts, pants was seen as less classy. Where most women do not have tatoos, then having tatoos is seen as less classy, etc. What's "classy" in Gilbert may be seen as tasteless in NY. It absolutely is a social comparison. One must analyze their social circle and community to understand what the community views as "classy". Gathering opinions is one way to do that.
I absolutely know and respect that we all have different tastes...this is simply mine.
"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein
I don't have a problem with
I don't have a problem with your suit preference. i do have a problem with you insinuating that someone who wears a bikini somehow lacks class or isn't as classy as you. Generally, I find your opinions to be well balanced on this site, but today I found your choice of words to be judgmental.
I'm sorry that you took
I'm sorry that you took offense. I tried really hard to be clear that it was MY preference. Would the word, "Classic" have been received better? All I mean is the "look" of a one piece appears classier to me. I PERSONALLY associate classy with modesty. I am not judging a person's character in any way. Everyone has their own preference for style and the way that they wish to be perceived. I, myself, prefer....
stud earnings vs large hoops....
wearing a bra vs going bra-less...
natural skin vs tatoos...
natural hair color vs green, pinks or blue...
collar bones showing, but no cleavage...
french manicure vs red nail polish...
dressing my sons in polo shirts vs army camouflage...
one piece swimsuit vs a bikini...
etc.
BUT...I'm far more likely to be good firends with a bra-less, tatooed, hoop wearing, pink haired, cleavage showing, gal in a camouflage bikini with black nail polish, as most anyone you might know! I DO NOT judge those who choose a different style - for themselves. MANY of my friends do and tease me about being so modest, when I seem so "open minded"! It's not a contradiction though.
As for little girls...I do think that a bikini should be worn by women. I think that a bikini is designed to show off a body and that doesn't seem appropriate for a child. Perhaps that's where you see me as judging? My girlfirend brought her 14 yr old daughter to my son's birthday, pool party last year , and she was wearing a bikini. She no longer looker 14, but hey, that's HER daughter and the daughter's taste. I'm only saying that I would not put my little girl in a bikini.
But, kids aside, I do think that one piece suits are classier than bikinis. And, I don't think that saying so is any more of a judgement than saying that "Dock Martins" look more militant than sneakers, or that baggy pants look more "grunge" than jeans, or that dress slacks look classier than shorts, etc. All "looks" have a place. And, all "looks" say something about the person wearing them - granted, what is perceived, may not be what is trying to be projected, but clothes do "speak" to others about you. Maybe, a bikini wearer is only trying to project that they are happy with their body? Or maybe a bikining wearer is trying to project that they like to be noticed and admired? Or maybe a bikini wearer is trying to project that they are insecure and have to be the center of attention? Who knows! It depends upon the person, the way they carry themselves, and the style preference of the others around them who will be perceiving them. I get all of that.
Perceiving another's style and accepting or rejecting such a style for oneself, will always be done and is very different from holding another to a negative stereotype based upon that style. I would never treat a bikini wearer any differently from a one piece suit wearer...but I do think that the one piece is a "classier" look...and I don't think that anyone should take my style preference too seriously!
"Only a life lived for others, is the life worthwhile" - Albert Einstein
I think a "bikini body" is
I think a "bikini body" is in the eye of the beholder. I know many woman(including myself) that are much harder on themselves than they should be. with that said, I have and do wear a bikini. I do not have a perfectly built body since pregnancy and breastfeeding, but my tummy is flat and bears no stretch marks. With the right top, even the girls get the coverage and support they need. My problem couldn't be helped by a one piece as I tend to have a pear shape. So, if I am in public, a sarong is my comfort object(not to use mommy slang:)). I say if you feel comfortable and aren't embarrassing your family(and I use the last one lightly because I think all children are embarrassed that they even have parents at some point regardless of what they are wearing during bathing suit season) go for it!
I agree with you......I
I agree with you......I still wear bikinis......thong bikinis, no, but regular bikini's, yes. I am in pretty good shape, and until I am not, i will continue to wear them. For me, they are more comfy, and a one piece just isn't flattering or comfortable.
I think a bikini can still be tasteful, and I actually wore one to our school's water day....with board shorts. I see nothing wrong with that....I suppose someone might have though it wasn't "classy', but that is more their problem than mine. To each their own.
I agree...I wore a bikini
I agree...I wore a bikini when I was in better shape and plan to again when I'm again looking hot. I also agree that it's how you wear it (I wear my suits with board shorts or shorts also). I like one piece suits when I'm at functions and I like a tankini for a more "fun" suit. I do own my string bikini for JUST tanning purposes and even when I wear it "around our house" my hubby thinks it's horrid. My issue is I have rather large breasts so bathing suits never fit well UNLESS its a two piece (which is why I like tankinis).
"It's not to late to become who you've always wanted to be..."
Just remember there will
Just remember there will always be someone smaller or bigger than us. I'm not happy with my extra 4 inches right now, so I will not be laying by the pool, but I'm thankful that I am able to walk and enjoy. There could always be worse things to happen to us. In time, I know we'll all have our bodies back. I try to stay positive by knowing I have a healthy son, and he was worth every inch gained.
Some women wrap the swim skirts around them at the pool, and I think that looks very nice and in style.
One Happy Mom in Arizona.
For me, it's an age thing. I
For me, it's an age thing. I don't care if you have the most beautiful body in the world. There's comes a time in your life that you're just too old to wear a bikini. It's the same thing with how short a skirt or shorts are. I don't mean they should be down to your knees but with age comes the fact that all that stuff is not necessary. And kids don't want their Mom's to look like teenagers or TRY to look like teenagers!
Paz
There are some cute bikini's
There are some cute bikini's out there that have the boy short bottoms that are really super cute!! I like the suits back from the 50's I think they are adorable, and are very figure flattering. Not so big on the itti bitti bikini's. You won't catch me in one of those. I'm good for a one piece or something that looks more sporty with a boy short and almost looks like a tank top out of swimsuit material for a shirt. Those are for me. Nothing for me quite yet as I have some work to do.
Lisa - Mom to her spunky little Scarlette
I'm a big fan of swim shorts
I'm a big fan of swim shorts (I have matching racing tops). I like to play in the pool, and it's nice not having to worry about falling out of my suit.
I still wear my bikini. I am
I still wear my bikini. I am 21 & My son is 6 months and my stretch marks have mostly faded away. Although i still have a scar from my surgery when i was pregnant, It doesnt bother me to wear i wouldnt wear a bikini. My view on myself is, I am almost 15 lbs lighter than before i even got pregnant with my son. I think that i look decent enough to wear a bikini and will do so until -God forbid- i dont. If people think i dont because i have some very faded stretch marks and a scar on my stomach then i really dont care! Its all about how i feel about myself. :)
As a former bikini model
As a former bikini model back in the late 80's, early 90's, I loved wearing bikinis and wore them up to before my pregnancy with Kelly...then my body reshaped - some I am ok with but the other like my belly - eck :( Since then I have not worn a bikini and I do like to get back into it. I am just not ready for it until I lose all of my 30 pregnancy pounds off which I am currently working on! At the same time, I have grown to like the one piece bathing suits that Old Navy have - the classic look ones as they shape my body nicely and funny, I felt sophiscated - it's weird to say this. So I may end up being flexible - wear bikinis in my private space like home and whenever there is a party or out in the public pools, I'll switch to the one piece suit.
H~
Mom of 2 Daughters - Kelly (3 yrs) and Skylar (21 mos old)
zoostationu2@hotmail.com
I noticed that old navy does
I noticed that old navy does have a lot of cute suits.....and when I went swimsuit shopping this year I tried on some of their one pieces......but I am petite and I have kind of a short torso, so they usually look wierd on me.....it seems like bikinis make me look better. There is nothing "hanging out", so to speak.....my breasts are between a B and a C cup so the triangle top covers them adequately.
Nothing wrong with the
Nothing wrong with the triangle ones :) Usually they are better on cup your size than smaller or larger ones.
I still have my favorite silver triangles in my closet!
H~
Mom of 2 Daughters - Kelly (3 yrs) and Skylar (21 mos old)
zoostationu2@hotmail.com
I do! I kids, a 4 year old
I do! I kids, a 4 year old and a 9 mo old, I am 26 yrs old and still very thin, I am foirtunate to be very thin and have some stretch marks but they arent real noticeable as they are low on my abdomin and get covered up mostly by my suit. I think if you feel comfortable and arent FALLING OUT, then who cares what anyone thinks.
Once upon a time, I
Once upon a time, I would've. In my early 20's when I hovered around 125 lbs, I wore bikinis all the time. After I gained 45 lbs, I still wore a two piece on occasion (even in public), and never thought about what other people might be thinking. Another 40 lbs later, and nope, wouldn't wear one! I could care less about the weight in the butt/thighs; aside from a skirted suit, that flab'll show whether I wear a one or two piece. But I'm sure most people would prefer not to see my torso bared, and I can respect that. I'm slowly taking some of the weight off, and you can bet that when I get back to my mid-point, I'll wear a two piece again, curves and all!
Jennifer, mom to one special little boy
I wear a pregnancy bikini
I wear a pregnancy bikini right now and I think it looks great on me and have gotten several compliments. I think people are surprised it can look flattering.
Now whether I will wear one after the baby is born that wil be a stay tuned til next summer because who knows how my body will look.
I would totally wear a
I would totally wear a bikini if I could find one that adquately supported my chest. I am talking underwire, etc., because these babies have been much better days! The pick a part suits (where you can buy a top and bottom separately) are being more popular so I need to venture out and try and find one that I really like.
I actually did see a woman wearing a beautiful bikini one time - she had smaller hips and a large chest and I was kind embarrassed to ask her because my bathing suit looked so bland...
Mouse_tales is a discussion leader in the East Valley for arizonamoms.com. She spends most of her days juggling her duties as a (bio & step) mom, wife, and business owner. Her three little kittens range in age from 5 to 13.
Yes, I have. But lately I
Yes, I have. But lately I think I would scare people. Going with a tankini instead this summer.
I love being a mom!
i wouldnt..... wear on in
i wouldnt..... wear on in public i am sure there are tastful ones but i dont think they are practical and if u are focasing on kids why do u need to worry about wardrobe malfuntions. and in public, there is always someone looking that shouldnt be .. that alone creeps me out. ppl are to disrespectful and why put urself in that place just a humble opinion
"dont pee on my leg and tell me its raining"
I'm afraid my bikini days
I'm afraid my bikini days are gone for now. I still have some in my drawer, but I'm not close to putting one on. Now, if I lost weight, and felt good in one, I'd wear one again. I'm going to Cancun in January, so maybe things will be better by then!
Hobbymommy, 38, is a discussion leader from Mesa. She is a happy stay-at-home mommy to a 3-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son.
Personally, I would not wear
Personally, I would not wear a bikini, I just have never felt comfortable in one and the last thing I have ever wanted to be is uncomfortable. I think it is great for those who are comfortable with wearing one, no matter what their shape or size, as long as they are not obscene.
It has been interesting since my daughter has gotten older dealing with the bikini issue from another perspective. She looks adorable in a bikini and went through the stage where she thought that is what she wanted to wear. That period was short lived. She has found that she too likes to be wearing a little more in the pool. I can not blame her, but I wish I would have only allowed her to get one to see whether she would like wearing them for an extended period of time. Live and learn!
JuneSlager is a discussion leader for arizonamoms.com, raising three children (ages 15, 14, & 11) in Northeast Phoenix.