Ok I'd like some opinions on something that happened to me at the zoo 2 weeks ago.
I have twins in the 1st grade and we went to the zoo. The first exhibit that we saw was the elephants. It was an enclose area that we walked into with trees on 2 sides and the exhibit in front of us. My kids ran in a little bit ahead of me and ran up to the fence. I was following them as quickly as my chubby legs could go and saw then go around a woman with a twin stroller who had stopped in the middle of the area and was looking in the habitat. I walked -around her stroller- when she suddenly started pushing her stroller and just barely clipped my ankle. I turned to her and said "oh sorry, excuse me". She said "some people should be more careful." When I turned to look at her (in disbelief) I said "what" and she just gave me the dirtiest look and had such an aggressive stance behind her stroller I was taken aback. She said again "you should be more careful." Now I am not a fighter nor do I like confrontations. I remember pushing around that double stroller and all the times I was bumped and accidentally bumped someone or something myself so that's why I said I was sorry + I genuinely was sorry. However when she said that so nasty I said to her "really you're going to say that to me", shook my head, called my kids and left. When I looked back she was still glaring at me.
This obviously upset me because it didn't just happen yesterday and I still get upset when I think about how I was just trying to get to my children -before they started to climb- and said I was sorry and she was still that rude. I know as a first time mom and of twins no less I was VERY protective of them, but I really don't think I would have been that upset in this kind of situation.
So that's my story. I'd like to know what you think and how you would have handled it.
By the way I'm no angel I know after her reaction to me I gave her "a look" in return as I left.
bookworm_mom ~ mommy of twins
I can totally understand why
I can totally understand why that bothered you. I'm pretty nice most of the time, but when someone is deliberately rude to me, it's hard to not fight back. I'd probably given her "a look" too, even though it really wouldn't have been worth it. I have found that when I don't let the other person get to me, I feel much better. And actually, it bugs them even more!! So, I try to just laugh it off, but don't feel guilty for letting her get to you. You're human! Now, forget about her! :-)
Hobbymommy, 38, is a discussion leader from Mesa. She is a happy stay-at-home mommy to a 3-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son.
I'm sorry--I cna't tell you
I'm sorry--I cna't tell you how many times something happens to me, and I don't say anything, then I rehearse what I wish I would have said over and over. I hate when something consumes me like that. All you could do was say sorry; you did your part.
Brooke Romney is an unbalanced mom of three young boys who constantly has too much to do, and too little time. She writes the Mom Beat column for The Gilbert Republic.
Whenever this sort of thing
Whenever this sort of thing happens to me, people being exceptionally rude for no real reason, I just try to realize that this has nothing to do with me, I'm just the person at the end of the outlet for her/his pent up anger.
No it doesn't help to get that person to change her/his attitude, but it does help me not to take it personally.
The daycare tells my son when one of his toddler friends shoves him or something similar, that so and so is sad today, so that fights don't break out amongst irrational toddlers.
So I just try to think that so and so is sad today. Doesn't always work, but sometimes it does, ahd then the bad mood is not passed on to me.
I know exactly what your
I know exactly what your saying,and I thought that stuff only happened to me, lol There have been so many times, and I try not to let it get to me,because if it does get to me then the "won" which makes me even madder, but let it go,just know you were not wrong,and definitely not alone,and think of a cute comeback to get ready for the next time,because rest assured there will be a "next time" I hope you have better luck than me to use the comebacks you come up with,because I have never actually said my comebacks to someone.
I know you probably are not
I know you probably are not going to like my comment.
The lady may have just been having a bad day and she was being rude or
Because your children ran off ahead of you and you didn't see them they could have knocked her and her stroller and she might have been trying to avoid them, then when you came by and knocked it again she could be annoyed with how you let your children run ahead of you.
I get annoyed that some parents let their children run crazy with no consideration for others. I blame the parents for not instilling manners in the kids.
Just my two cents..
That mom was very rude to
That mom was very rude to you - you have a right to be upset. I try to apologize when something like that happens or graciously accept an apology from another parent. I don't know why this is so hard for people to do!
That said, fuming over it is a waste of your energy.
Susie is a discussion leader in the east valley for arizonamoms.com. She has two sons, ages 7 and 3.
Well thanks to you moms for
Well thanks to you moms for your support. I appreciate hearing about how others moms would have handled it and their input on how I handled it.
I was afraid at first to say anything on the web site for fear that I would hear back from a friend or acquaintance of hers and find out that her twins were 6 months premature and that bump knocked one of their arms off. Then I’d be screwed because my kiddos were only 6 weeks premature, so she’d have me beat and I’d have to drop off the panel! ; )
That being said I am very proud of my children and constantly get compliments on how well behaved they are, especially for their age.
I do want to say though that I never said I couldn't see my children - they never get that far from me - we was at the entrance of the living room size enclosed area, when they ran ahead of me to get to the fence. My children know not to even get close to a stroller, they even ask before they look in at a baby in a stroller. They ran around the stroller and when I came hustling up to make sure they didn't try to climb - like the other kids to - see better, I to went around her stroller. She suddenly came pushing forward and hit me. I understand the posters’ comments about uncontrolled children, but in this case that would not be my children.
I have concluded by all of this that I should feel confident in the way I handled this and know you can’t please everyone, no matter how hard I try. Sometimes you just have to walk away and say oh well.
In closing 10 after it happened I thought I saw the mom by the petting zoo and went over to apologize again, but it wasn’t her. : )
bookworm_mom ~ mommy of twins