ways to make your relationship still sparkle

Bottom line you need to MAKE the time. Hopefully you have TiVo and he can record ESPN. If not, he just needs to make the sacrifice. ESPN runs again (and again, and again!!! :)) Perhaps it's a night you just put the dishes in the sink and wait until morning. For my husband and I, we made a commitment long ago never to put work, sports and our kids before each other. We've made our relationship our priority. Too often we saw older parents have trouble when the wife put the kids first and the husband his job. We both have to make sacrifices and sometimes with 3 boys school and sports schedules our jobs and household chores, it's not easy. If we can we get a sitter once a week and go out on a date. If we can't...kids go to bed a bit earlier and we do something that's benefits us both. Since we've made this a priority 6 years ago, I can honestly say that we have maintained a strong committed relationship. I believe our boys have benefited too as they see how much we are committed to each other. I think they feel very secure knowing that mom and dad really love each other. Probably a little long and more than you cared to hear. Just know that it's hard when our lives are so busy but you need to make the time if you want your relationship to stay strong. My advice is to simply put each other first.

One idea is scheduling a date night. For us Fridays are 'family night' we all go out to eat as a family and come home and play with our son either board games or with his cars. Then on Saturday (of course we only do this once a month) we go out on a date just the two of us. We find that this is our time to talk and 'date' as a couple. We hire a sitter to watch our little one. Again, we typically only do this once a month, but it really is so refreshing to just get out the two of us. If you cannot find a sitter then you can schedule an evening that you can have a date at home & just the two of you talk (no t.v) and visit. Hope that helps.

LisaMommy is a discussion leader in Paradise Valley/Scottsdale area for arizonamoms.com. Her two boys are ages 5 months and 3 years old.

This was posted at babycenter.com and I copied it once before on this site I thought the ideas were fun and "doable" (maybe pun intended.)

Flirting and cyber flirting
"I send my husband e-mail saying that I can't wait to be alone with him. When he gets home, we flirt until the kids go to bed. We also bet on everything — football games, the outcome of a show we're watching, anything. We bet for, well, favors! And every once in a while, I light candles in the bedroom before we go to bed."
— Nicole, New Jersey

"We send short, sweet text messages to each other's cell phones. We compliment each other. We meet for lunch dates. We often let household chores go undone and try not to worry about it. We don't expect too much of each other and try not to get disappointed with one another. We've learned that these things are vital to keeping the marriage alive, not just the romance."
— Pamela Work, mother of Tiffany, 8, and Cecily, 2, Dallas, Texas

"If my husband is on the computer, I go over and rub his back to let him know that I'm thinking of him. And if I'm doing the dishes, he'll come over and pat my bottom. With a 2-year-old in the house, sex isn't as plentiful as it used to be. But with all that playing around, it doesn't take long to get in the mood."
— Nikki, Virginia Shower power
"Our favorite thing to do is shower together. It's something we have to do anyway, so we do it together. Once our daughter's down for the night, we both hop into a steamy shower and talk about whatever's on our minds. Our troubles and fears go 'down the drain,' and it lets us slow down, relax, and enjoy each other."
— Kara, Maryland

Lovemy4 is a discussion leader for North Central Phoenix, tired mother of 4 great kids and wife to one great husband.

Maybe you should drop a knowledge bomb on him and let him know that contrary to what most men believe, the world does not revolve around sporting events. ......I see you mentioned that you work full time and are also handling most of the work related to your son......and my thought was how typical of a man to sit back and allow the woman to do most of the work, then expect her to drop everything when he is ready for attention....and even that is proritized behind the constant fixation on sports............keeping a relationship alive requires sacrifice and effort from BOTH parties, so he has got to make a few concessions along the way.
Not trying to start an argument, but I have to say that I disagree when I hear people say the marriage should be more important than the children. I think the family as a whole should be the number one priority - for both the husband and the wife. The children did not ask to be brought into the situation, so I don't think it's right to constanly tell them they are not as important as mom and dad's romance. Just my opinion.